The One Where My Husband Saved Hulk Hogan

People that know me well know that one of my favorite hobbies is calling in to radio stations and trying to win stuff.  I am generally unsuccessful at this, minus the time I won a vacation to Mexico.

{No really, I did.  8 years ago I won a trip to Mexico.}

But my luck changed recently and I won a boat rental on a local lake for telling the following true story live on the radio as part of "OMG Mondays" on Atlanta's 94.9 The Bull.

It was 4th of July weekend, my sister, brother, and future sister-in-law were visiting, and we find ourselves bored with free babysitting on a Saturday night.  The younger peeps were getting stir crazy and wanted to "go out."  To the hubby and I, "going out" usually involves having run out of some kind of staple item like toilet paper or ketchup, forcing one of us to leave the house on the weekend.  Of course that's not what they meant, so we racked our brains to think of a local place we could go.  And we knew there was only place truly worthy of a Southern Saturday night "out"...

Opi's Roadhouse.  Doesn't the name alone just reek of class and civility?  HA.  All your suspicions are right... it is THAT kind of place.

So anyway, we all got gussied up in our boots and jeans and rode in the Jeep all of 5 miles to Opi's, and kicked off our evening by halfheartedly playing some pool while we waited for seating to open up on the patio where a local band was playing.  Once outside, we were rocking to the beat when all of a sudden my sister says (while pointing to the ground): "Is that a... surely that's not a... SNAKE!!!"

Oh, was it though.  A long, scary, black snake weaving its way through the crowd.  And before anyone could even comprehend it, the snake starts coiling its way up the leg of a barstool.  Heading straight towards some poor, unsuspecting guy's butt.

Did I mention this guy looked like Hulk Hogan?  Yeah.  This is no small guy.  Shaved head, handlebar mustache, muscles on muscles... and also completely unaware that his cheeks were about to get greeted by a reptile.

So my hubby does what apparently seemed the most logical to his caveman "must save person from snakebite" brain... and pushes through the crowd to grab the guy by the back of the shirt and yank him off the barstool.

Did I mention this guy looked like a pro wrestler?

So it was no surprise that dude whips around with a fist up, ready to clean Chris's clock.  His two buddies are in the middle of saying "Oh **** dude!  He's gonna beat your..." when Chris points out the snake.  At which point all three guys start screaming like little girls and running in circles.

A waitress sees the scene and comes over to "break it up" only to see the snake herself, at which point she calmly steps on its head and shouts "Is somebody gonna come wrangle this thing or what?"  Lucky for her, a local snake wrangler was in attendance that night and quickly came to take the thing away (after about 30 people snapped pictures to post on Twitter/FB, of course).  We joked that it would probably be making a guest appearance in a rural church somewhere the next morning.

Chris and the near-victim shook hands and exchanged a few laughs, and for the rest of the time we were there, it was pretty much the only topic of conversation in the entire place. 

If you are waiting for a punchline... here it is:  song playing during the whole snake escapade?

"Don't Gimme No Lines And Keep Your Hands To Yourself!"  You just can't make this stuff up!